Full suit is seen in British
I've learn way more about dress code than back in Malaysia
I've learn that it's always good to overdress than under dress
there was this one time,
I went attended a forum with a "smart casual" dress code
I put my trenchcoat in the cloak room and walk to the venue like a boss
in a formal dress
BOOM
everyone was blazer, white collar tee, and no jeans to be seen.
lucky for me, a few other people step in,
and they stood out more, cuz the wore checkered shirts and jeans
----
the point is,
this will never have happened in life back in Malaysia
who the hell in their right minds will wear blazer so often in such an incredible weather of sunshine and thunderstorm?
Things will be very different already
I've learnt a lot these past few months,
on my terminologies about fashion, garments and more
-------
and also,
这几天考试，
环顾一看
everyone is different in skin colour, look and more
but no matter in what stages of life,
exam halls still look similar
and the attendees have the same look
stress and non-stop writing
the feels are the same
the stakes are similar
people still have the guts to NOT show up for exams
----------
In university,
it's really easy to feel like giving up
to look yourself in the mirror and ask, why are you doing all this?
Is this the right path?
Do I want this?
and more...
I used to say, make a decision and don't look back
but when it comes to days of being alone and not talking to a solid human being everyday
one can't help but start thinking a lot
Especially the days when I don't talk at all, no virtual meetings, no video calls with wei liang
I'm just all alone...
Solitary confinement is not easy
One might go insane really easily ..
The mind strolls and your body doesn't want to go out anymore...
When you push yourself up and actually go out to get groceries, that's the only time when you go ..
Oh, so this is life...
-----
I have 2 more papers to go
Life still goes on.
and I have to just keep rolling with it ...
I know I won't do well this exams
judging by my performances and blank-outs for 2 of my papers
but hey
I can't do much anymore
If time travels back,
what would I have done it differently?
The point is , I don't think I will change it a lot
and I won't put the blame on my time dedication to other things in uni
because this IS part of the experience
For once, in a very very long time,
my balance was wobbled up, and I'm trying hard to grab on to balance
I think I'm finding it again.
All in all, I just have to keep moving and looking forward ..
--------
Regaining my balance and sanity took me a few days
When one is feeling hopeless and down
it's best to just talk to people about it
not just type it out,
but really talk ...
it feels strange coming out of my mouth
because it's like if you don't say it, it's not real
jia you :)
-----
after all the papers,
i'll start my life again
travelling, networking, ICMS and more
and best of all,
going back home
where my troubles and sorrow seem so faraway
(not really)
-------------
To take a leap of faith ....
this is hard
but I have to learn how to do it
心态上的改变
不代表行动上有所改变
It's difficult, and I'm not ready
but who is ever ready?
We said something to each other the other day,
And I know it's very important for me to take,
yet another leap of faith ....
I don't know where this road will lead me to
but I hope that my guts don't screw me up too much
It would be a mistake if we don't make mistakes
At the end of the day, I will only regret that chances that I didn't take
and for my tiny moments and decisions to actually shine.
