On the 23rd of May 3am, I was on my way out of London with some of the chem eng friends
I can't remember the last time I was this prepared for an exam
I can only hope that I have done enough to stay afloat
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I had my CI scholarship final interview on the 16th May
The person is damn confused when I say
"I'm a chemical engineering student and a freelance graphic designer, I'm looking for a management consulting internship"
Probably also why I didn't ace my final interview
Like a lot of people, I didn't know what I want.
Wasted the whole day doing that application
but we all learn from mistakes
and my mistake
is not knowing what I want
hopefully from the engineering internship this summer
I will know for sure if I like or despise the work
it's a good pay
that I can say
I no longer say things like "the pay doesn't matter"
because it does
I don't work for free
and that's the bottom line
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tempted to throw out my stack of notes
but then again, it's better to be safe than sorry
late summer assessment
the dreaded time of the year that you hope you never have to come back to the UK
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KY got a PhD offer in Exeter :D
and so does Wai Jue :D
So excited for the both of them ^^
Skipping masters to do a PhD
with full funding for tuition fees and living expenses paid off by the university
that's the epitome of success that I can't seem to fathom
Their parents must be so proud of them :D
You know when you were young, you wanted to be a princess.. a scientist.. an astronaut... a race car driver
It all sounds crazy and is seemingly impossible
but you end up applying for jobs like trading stocks in the back office of the bank, a commercial analyst for the energy distribution company etc...
Yet, these people are on the pathway to becoming a scientist.
Can you imagine that?
They are living examples for the little kids out there that they can indeed do what they want in life as long as they work hard for it.
And I am so so so proud of the both of them
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On top of that, Yu Xian secured a job in London!
I called him straight away after hearing about it...
I sensed the relief in him, it was such a life-changing moment for him
and I hope all good comes to him, he deserves it after working so hard
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Here's the catch,
since I didn't manage to secure an internship in the UK
I can only have one more shot at getting a job here
Tbh, I had my heart set in returning to Malaysia
getting into EY, into strategy consulting where I really enjoyed what I did
The thought of not being an engineer delights me :3
However, my senior manager from UEM once told me,
you can't assume that you wouldn't like your job in the engineering field when you haven't even tried it.
and that makes sense...
Would I want to be a subpar engineer who don't really like what I do but has the qualifications to do so?
Or would I jump straight into designing where I have no qualifications and only experience?
How about consulting where I thoroughly enjoyed it but only have minor qualifications and limited experience?
The golden question
How valuable am I to the economy of the UK?
probably not a lot
how can I persuade the companies to pay extra money to hire me when I can't even persuade myself that I'm above average?
When engaging in conversations with friends
about how happy I am for him and his future
they asked me the same questions: "So, what are you plans YT? " "Are you actually staying back for him?"
For starters,
I have no idea what the future holds for me
The more fields I try, the more confused I get
I have no clue what I want to do but I don't want to be hasty with my decisions
One thing for sure,
Him getting into Exeter is definitely a huge plus point for me to stay
I'm not doing this for myself only anymore
I'm doing this for us
I no longer have "nothing to lose", in fact, it's the complete opposite
I'm sincerely afraid ...
of what lies ahead
... another golden question "What happens if you don't get a job here"
The truth is, there is simply no Plan B this time
I either win it all or lose it all ...
But first, I need to make up my mind on what I can do, and what I should do
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Went to France again from the 23rd to 27th
Nice, Marseilles, Monaco, Villefranche Sur Mer
it was beautiful
and I've learnt that we are lazy and we shit well
3 toilet rolls in 3 days for 6 people
mind = blown
falling in love with chill trips as such
Rested a lot
Talked a lot
Shared our thoughts on politics, growth, moral controversies, policies, economy etc...
typical lunch topics
A nice farewell trip with those who aren't going to be in UCL next year :')
3 years
just like that
Although, you do get used to saying goodbyes as you age
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Merci Beaucoup :)
