8月21日~~

与世隔绝了一段时间
目前
你问我什么，我legit什么都不知道

在design 的世界里呆久了
就忘了怎么和世界交际 @@

发现隆中华管乐团有出现在东运会的开幕典礼

is it weird that up till this day
I still have that warm fuzzy feeling when something like that happens?
super proud of them and where I came from
knowing how much they have trained for this

and makes me feel like tearing up :')
I'm naturally emotional anyways

突然有很多flashback to 中学那5年


母校就是你一天会骂它8百次，却不容许别人辱骂它一次的地方


super true :)
不忘初衷
饮水思源
waiting for my internship to end before I go back to find my teachers
probably wait for rose, wei and xian to come back also :')

8月19日~~

There are 2 types of people one likes
1 - The dream guy / girl
2 - The right guy / girl at the right time

both statements don't necessarily need to equate
a lot of times, we dwell on the fact that we aren't perfect enough
it takes much more courage to admit that we may just be the right person at the right time

All your perfect imperfections, all your curves and all your edges

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8C1Y3NDaIak

8月13日~~

Halo.. today's blog post will be a bit different..
For the past 21 years of my life,
I have received quite a few comments and a few life advice from people

while some are pretty common, some are pretty.... unorthodox..
legit made me laugh even if it was supposed to be offensive to me



1. "You're like a cactus poking my brain"
Said Valerie, my violin teacher when I made mistakes and didn't play her favourite song properly


2. "You look like the sloth from Zootopia"
: > No comment : >
I told jessica that if she is an animal, she'd be a cat.. and she said this to me, and asked a lot of people during the event, they all agreed unfortunately : > .. now I have this image

3. "Actually, I think you look more like sid from ice age" 
Jamie: "NO CHRIS, THAT IS SO MEAN" ... yes obviously 这种酱残忍的说话，只有最亲的人才敢讲，of course.. my flatmate la walao ... SO EVIL

4. "You have eyes of Garfield"

This is from my mom, of all the cats and all the animals, she chose to use Garfield as the point of reference. She say I have them when i'm bored or look tired

5. "You sound like the Matrix" 

My boss called me this at work last year, he is the boss of my senior manager, but because my team is so small (including him and the senior manager, only got 4 people) I get to help him quite often.

He called me this when I said "Goodbye" with a merciless (or bored) expression as I deleted something from the presentation during discussion.

YES, I did something as lame as that OMG ... I'm such a joker sometimes, I can't even .... : > I swear it wasn't on purpose.... 

they had to stop and laugh at me for a good 1 minute. 

6. " You ... Dolphin"

..... I can't even start with this ... is this meant to be offensive ????? The word "dolphin" is definitely not a strong word, nor is it a weak word ... not a good or bad word .. it's one of the most neutral word I've ever heard .... 

I couldn't help it but to ask Jay what he actually meant the 2nd day (yes I dwell on the past, don't judge) 

apparently I was laughing when we were dancing ballroom, and he said I made a "high pitch sound" and the only thing he can think about was .. a dolphin .. 

I think I was just catching my breath while I was laughing like how I always do .. lel

7. "Me and my friend both think, you look like a giraffe"

First of all, what's up with everyone generalizing me with all the 非主流 animals.. but this term came to me the first time when I was in Form 1. 依学 told me about this. 

The reason why I look as if I have a long(er) neck than regular people, is because I have really small shoulders... and my shoulders are slanted down, it's genetic .. 

I often tell my friends that I feel as though my shoulders are non-existent, and it's like drawing a stickman, where my arms are just stuck to my own body without the shoulder part (yes this is a self burn)

8. "You look like a chipmunk"

Correct. This has something to do with my imperfect teeth and the way I laugh. I do acknowledge my weird smile that is "deeper than the mariana trench". It's genetic gaizzzzz, idk which facial muscle should I control to stop myself from doing this. Have been trying to figure this when my primary school mate told me about this.

This comment actually came from my high school best friend - shi min. She normally draw cards for me with this as a theme : >

9. "You look like a squirrel"

I know what you're thinking.. isn't chipmunk something like a squirrel???
but apparently this points out a totally different part of my body..

It's my pony tail.

Before I 电直my hair, my hair wasn't perfectly straight when I tie it up.

But instead of calling it a pony tail, some of my friends decided to call it a "squirrel tail", cuz of how bushy it looks.

hmmmmmm 

10. "有人说过你长得像孙燕姿吗？"

K la, this one rub my ego a bit :3 .. because a few people have told me I look like her from an angle :3

Yes this is a compliment. 

 

On that note. let me end this section of "Who and What YT looks like"

Here are some of my favourite quotes from my favourite man on earth - my dad 

1. "葶，读书不用酱辛苦叻，不用拿一百分的" - He said to me when I was in high school
2. "葶，学会懒惰一点也是一种福气，不要酱积极" - He said this to me just now, when I told him I'm quite tired and I legit lied down on his belly like a koala on a tree brunch

3. "Life is to be enjoyed"
4. "Nothing is impossible"
5. "什么都不知道的女人最幸福"

Did you know, my dad is the one that got me into drinking? 

He offers me sips of wine all the time 

and we do drink wine / whisky almost every night if we're at home. 

We normally drink when we're having our post-dinner chitchat 

but right now, because I'm designing stuff again, it has been a while since we last had that ^ 

世界上有多少爸爸是叫女儿少努力一点

可是又同时酱supportive in everything she does? 

=====

As I grow up, my personality became more and more defined.. 

I can't decide if I'm stubborn or determined

so I guess, it's just quite hard to stop me when I want something. 

======

Fun fact, Puuung is an amazing artist. Big fan of her work since she started in 2013. 

her drawings are AMAZING and portrays the kind of relationship that I would love to be in. 

They capture the beauty of everyday, 

bring out that cozy, fuzzy feeling of being in love, 

where the presence of your partner is enough. 

The comment section reminds me, 

that relationships like these do exist..

It completes the part of me that I've lost for a while. 

It takes me back to the time when relationships aren't complicated

when life is more black and white, 

and there aren't grey zones like potential brozones and friendzones

"比朋友多一点仅此而已"这种模棱两可的感情世界

but to be fair, I brought this upon myself

when I broke up, I didn't know how to be single anymore. 

I was never close to a lot of friends when I was in a relationship. 

I only trusted one person with all my secrets and insecurities. For legit 3 years. 

So, when I was single, I was damn friendly to everyone 

I was lonely. So, my friends and work filled up the void and kept me sane. 

I guess that's when I've been sending out wrong signals to some people

and now I'm in some grey zones in the eyes of many. 

I guess I just can't handle things that are uncertain :') 

As strong as I try to be and as rational as I try to be,

 I'm still a sucker for love,

but 

to find someone that also wants the same thing, is getting rare

to find someone that don't see you as a hobby, is getting harder

最残忍的，就是不放手

Dear readers,

If you don't feel like you have a future with the person, please don't cling onto the other and don't flirt

this is not a friendly gesture, but more like a toxic relationship. 

8月6日~~

哈咯
我只手数清的全世界 ^^

最近有个朋友看了neymar 的身价与待遇后
告诉我“don't you think our lives are boring and dull”

哇，我好久没有听到有人酱来跟别人比了

to be fair
总觉得我最近过得挺充实的
甚至有种never been better的感觉
^^

---

依旧和朋友 有 "farewell lunch / dinner "
可能旁人听到感觉这有点夸张
哈哈哈哈
我才21，可以有什么farewell呢？

现实是
倘若everything is as planned ，这确实是last summer home
以后我回来马来西亚for good的时候
大家早已上班一段时间了

quite interesting innit?
life ..

启程时还蛮兴奋的
为充满着未知数的前途而兴奋
半途中才回首惊觉，
那些曾对你而言很重要的人，
都早已跟随着后方的一点透视消失了

很多 “你回英国前再见面吧！” 的善意谎言
和很多 “I'll see you when I see you ” 最steady的祝福

----

有很多Hard goodbye
min 的我差点lost it mate
HAHAHHA
虽然我好像整个假期和她见面最多次
but it's such a painful goodbye
她要回sarawak开学前的那个晚上和我一起出去吃饭
载她回家的时候
还死赖在我车上继续和我聊天
...
damn that hug
killed a little something in me

我们初二开始就混到很熟了
然后我们就一直同班到我高二离校为止

她就是那罕见的stick by your side那种朋友
她有聊起我高中时的pattern
每个早上，只看到我的书包；
每天两次下课，都找不到我吃饭（我都会skip meal做些学会的东西）；
每个放学，我不是留校做学会的东西，就是去学钢琴etc；

i'm legit not the best kind of friend you should have in high school hahaha
她说：你都不需要什么聊天的朋友，你都已经在那里跑来跑去了

呵呵~还说得挺贴切的
尽管如此，她还是跟我很 close。当然我不在的时候，她会找班上其他的同学聊天
还是会把我和这些人拉在一起

but she was there for me from day 1
上课听不懂的时候，给老师叫来白板解题，只有她一个人敢跑上来教我解。
期中考，和班上同学出去以外，都是和她单独出去聊天。
考试考不好，她还是会画点小图画，做点小小的手工艺品帮我加油加油。

记得初三那年，她gather了很多人的祝福语贴在一个大大的板上

高一那年，我时常都不在班上。6.45am到学校，准时消失，第一堂课迟到，下课不在etc ……那年的她也忙着神请公假，代表学校出席很多很多的校外比赛。她的专长 -- 长跑 。她唯一的目标 - 冠军 and nothing less。 我做了个很省钱的charm bracelet 给她，基本上就是个 染色的麻绳中间挂着一个自己画上去的四叶草，还做了一张卡片给全部人（田径校队以外的人）写，帮她加油。那是她第一次抱着我哭。

高二那年，我是班上的康乐股股长，也就是说，我负责班上所有entertainment有关的活动 （ yes 学校是有点pattern的）including帮班上每个人庆祝生日，买礼物etc
当年的我, pattern没有差很远，都时常在MIA的状态, 在她生日那天，我在全班55个人的面前，交给她我印了的一张fake的飞机票去sarawak （当时她男朋友在curtin读书）。 那是她第二次抱着我哭。

高中的我，因为课外活动而成绩下滑
她和维良就是一直很耐心教我读书的人类
很感动……真的……不管我怎么拒绝他们的offer （因为我觉得自己很笨、很burden)
他们还是很坚持地教我读书，也能说是在“哄”我读书lol

我们share 着相同的梦想，进了同一个科系，
她同时也是最懂我的人。
没有人比她更懂我在想什么。

我们的关系，就是不常在网上聊天
但最开心/最伤心/很烦恼的时候
总是会找对方分享

很微妙的关系吧~~

熊猫是from 我高二代表M'sia去北京china - ASEAN cultural exchange festival 的那个星期带回来给她的~嘻嘻~

2nd year summer。我剪了短发，她留了长发。

今年生日，geyin 和huixian竟然找到她的contact我其实还蛮吓到的

毕竟我很少和别人提起她，谢谢文慧 ♥ 竟然想起她, 还save了整面给她bs omg。

PS.. we look freaking young 4 years ago .. my gosh 除了稚嫩还是稚嫩。

---


anyway
昨天托gary的福，竟然有机会跑puma night run
omg
这种价值百多块的东西，他有本事弄出两张free ticket很厉害叻~

相比之下 我比较享受london的run
比较有气氛，比较有景色，没那么Humid
这个route是平地没错，但真的是~闷HAHAHAHHA
唯一漂亮的，就是比吉隆坡多了几颗星星 :3

quite nice :3

但气氛不是很在
如果我摘下耳机，听到的就是很多人的脚步声和喘气声

前4公里，还是保留在5mins / km 的步伐 （ shocked myself man ）
后来，就真的在decelerate

最后3公里
还真的是痛苦
哈哈哈哈
就一条直路和一个u-turn
知道下个拐弯在前方，却好像永远跑不到
sigh ……累
直接……
decelerate + 走 + 慢跑

虽然到最后，我还是用 1 hr 18 mins 跑完 (target - 1 hr 20 mins)
但我最后的3公里真的是摸到~~~~~~~
哈哈哈哈哈那种 7 - 8 mins / km的状态哈哈哈哈哈

super dehydrated when i reached the finish line wei ..
好像几百年没有喝水酱~